We often hear “Failure is not an option” but do we really understand what that means? We often think it means that we must succeed at whatever it is we are trying to achieve. We tend to have a perspective that we either fail or succeed and that this is the only option we have. Achieve a goal…success! Do not achieve a goal…fail!  We are a results driven society. It is all about achievement, attaining our goals and if we do not we see ourselves as a failure. We also fear that others may see us as a failure and that drives us even more to succeed.

Let’s entertain another possible thought, another option. What if failure as an option did not exist? What if you never ever failed at anything? An intriguing possibility isn’t it??? What would happen if we found a new perspective on what we thought was a failure? What if despite what appeared to be a failure, we really did succeed?

It is commonly believed that if a marriage ends in divorce, then that marriage failed. We hear that all the time. A successful marriage by common societal terms means one that lasts “till death do you part”. So to avoid the pain of a “failed” marriage one might stay in that marriage even though the love and happiness is long gone. Is that really a successful marriage? Most of you would agree it is not. So why then when we leave a marriage because the love and happiness is long gone, do we still feel like we failed? Perhaps it is because we believe in failure in the first place. We believe that failure exists and as such we create it. We believe that failure is possible. What if the marriage was a success and what we were not seeing is just where the success is? Perhaps as a result of that marriage you learned so much about yourself that you now have a new desire as to what you want from a marriage. Can you see the success in that?

Success and failure in our culture is very subjective. It is measured by achievements and a set of standards that are quantifiable. We are taught this from an early age in our schools with the pass/fail grading system. We all have “failed” a test or did we?

There is success in everything that we do, even when we cannot see it. It is that fact that we cannot see it that leads us to believe that we “failed”. What we call failures is nothing more than abortive attempts to fulfill a desire that will lead us to better define that desire, redefine that desire, strengthen that desire or alter it all together. Can you see the success in that?

When you believe in yourself, when you believe that you cannot do anything but succeed, when you believe that failure as an option does not exist, then you have truly empowered yourself to live life as you want it to be and will experience new heights of happiness.